FOUR YEAR ANNIVERSARY

Retirement. Relocation. Reset. Redo. Restore. Revive.

Years ago, I dreamt about retirement. 

What would that be like?

Would it be what I longed for after many years of work? 

Now. Now, it was time. 

The long-awaited moments to relax and do only what I wanted to do.  

The time was here. 

There was no relaxation in sight. :-) 

Weeks prior to my lifestyle change was consumed with finalizing instructions at the museum where I worked. Creating instructions for the next person to do the job that I had done for nearly 10 years. This included writing instructions, teaching my replacement, and cleaning my home aka the Gift Shop at the museum. It meant taking several dozen photos to store in my memories. Dinners and lunches with friends before making this life change was bittersweet. Leaving so many people I loved. Longing to restore friendships with people I had missed in the Midwest.  

Over 11 years I worked at the Temple Railroad and Heritage Museum. 

First, as temporary help and ending my career there as the Museum Coordinator. 

As the coordinator, it is just a sweet title to reference the following jobs:

'Mom of the building'

'Caretaker of much'

'Gift shop lady'

'Tour guide' 

'Scheduler'

'Money handler'

Before landing at the museum, I worked for The Salvation Army as a bookkeeper, was unemployed for 2 years, attended two semesters of college, went through the Work Force programs for government-mandatory retraining; all the while helping others find jobs - the same jobs that I was applying for.  

Those earlier years were difficult and beneficial. 

Life challenges make you stronger. 

You learn much about yourself - things you wouldn't know if life was easy. 

What I gained was patience and perseverance. 

You did see the word patience, right? Well, that was the hardest of all. 

The struggles during those first years in Temple, Texas were excruciating.

Through all of it, I did build new friendships, learned new life skills; and that being angry or upset never ends well. (lessons for future posts) 

Now, 15 years after leaving South Holland, Illinois to move to Texas, I was going home. 

This time not to my hometown of Lansing, Illinois or back to the town I left, but a new location. Northwest Indiana. Fifteen minutes from Lake Michigan. The French word for The Door - LaPorte, Indiana. Stone Lake. This was to be my new home. 

Retirement takes time. 

It requires strength. 

It is often said, "it is not for the faint of heart". 

It is harder than you think it will be. 

Easier on days when you least expect it. 

Your past work experience gave you the training you need for retirement. 

The work is/was worth it.

Your rest times are better than ever before!

Life comes full circle. 

Fifty-five years is just a blink. 

Happy Anniversary to me on four years of retirement! And here's to the next four! 

 

WELCOME BACK - NOVEMBER 14, 2024

Hello Friends!

It was a good number of years ago when I first started this page about my life and ponderings. On this rainy November day, I decided it would be a great time to update. Four years ago, I was traveling from Temple, Texas to LaPorte, Indiana. 

It was the first days of my retirement from the Temple Railroad and Heritage Museum. Traveling cross country with my yellow lab, Gracie and her four cat siblings was a true adventure. Her siblings at the time: Jezze, Belle, Lizzie Jane and Charlie. 

My friend, Mark Mathew was on loan from his wife and drove the 16-foot U-Haul truck, loaded with my worldly belongings. My car was loaded with all the last-minute items and things we might need for overnight stays on the trek home. 

>More about the trip in future posts<

*****

This was my very first entry on my page in 2008? 

Welcome to my first Blog on this site!

Blogging (talking) is something I LOVE to do! just ask my friends.

I'm certain there are times that they just wish I would 'shut-up', 

but it seems I have lots of thoughts in my head and they just seem to tumble out of me.

I'm a curious person (does it REALLY kill the cat?) 

and that is how I found this blogging venue.

I actually began by looking for photos of elderly people's hands, 

and that lead to photos, 

and that--in turn--led to more connecting pages for crafts, scrapbooking, etc.

Then I found a wonderful page and wanted to leave a note,

but couldn't do that until I created THIS site.

So here I am!

WELCOME...and I hope to have interesting things to say.

It's been a LONG time...

Its been a LONG time since I've been on my page to write.  This morning, is still not going to be that time. I'm at work and I should be entering email addresses to increase our outreach for the Railroad & Heritage Museum. (See--here's the photo of where I work. It is the Santa Fe Depot. This is where I work.)  So...with that said, I'm off to start the addition of names, addresses and emails. 

Have a wonderful day and I'll be back soon.  I have so much to talk about! Love from my computer to you.~~Cyn.

A Day I Would Like to Live Over

The day I would enjoy reliving is Friday, April 7, 1974. 

On this day, I was a young, vibrant and happy woman at the beginning of a fresh new life. 

It was the day I was first married.

What began as a day to celebrate with a spring wedding became the day of an unexpected spring blizzard. With the anticipation of a smooth-running day, I woke to the forecast of cold weather and the possibility of snow. In the morning, I was scheduled to pick up my wedding dress, but the sky was already heavy grey, and the snow showers had begun. By midafternoon, the weather continued to worsen, and the snow was accumulating on the ground.

We arrived at the church by 5:30 p.m. after traveling over the roads which were already covered with heavy, wet and slippery snow. The wedding was planned as a 7:00p.m. candlelight service. Slowly our guests began to arrive at the church just minutes before the ceremony was to begin. As they entered, they took time to dust off the snow, remove their coats and boots and left them in orderly rows in the vestibule.

While the weather outside continued to get colder, the weather inside the church became warmer. The sanctuary was infused with the warmth of the low lights, the candles glowing and the peaceful music of the church organ playing in the background. The evening couldn’t have been any better! You could feel the closeness, intimacy and loving feelings which filled the church. Despite the unpleasant weather, it was one of my best evenings and a time I would cherish.

The ceremony commenced beginning with the minister’s words, continued with prayers being said and promises exchanged to live in permanence with another. The combination of these events all gave warmth of spirit and color to what was an otherwise pallid winter day.

After our “I dos” and “the kiss”, our photos were taken. The best moment—the truly most unforgettable moment—was when we were reenacting the lighting of the unity candle. 

In that briefest of moments, the intensity of love and the feeling of completeness overwhelmed me. 

I was married! 

It was at that very moment that I knew my life would never be the same.

Now, 38 years later I continue to remember that evening as if it was yesterday. 

It is a moment that was filled with joy, happiness and love. 

This is what makes our memories. 

Rainy Days in Texas

Hello all!

It's been QUITE some time since I've been on my page. It seems I get caught up on Facebook and Myspace, and I forget about this page.

Today, it is a quiet rainy day in Temple, Texas. It smells fresh outside; the air is cool (finally!) and it's just refreshing! All summer the weather has hovered around 110 and now with the air cooler at about 70 it has made a difference in my energy level. Seems I'm getting a lot more done each day.

I'm attending college for the first time in my life. Yes, I'm a college freshman attending our local school. For my first semester I am enjoying taking classes and the challenges it provides for my brain. It's been quite a while since I've been in school, but so far, I feel as though I'm accomplishing all my tasks at a good pace.

Autumn is my favorite time of year and even in Texas, when it rains the wind and water in the trees outside my window make a beautiful sound. The rustle of the leaves and the fresh fragrance of the air is refreshing to my soul. I guess when a Chicago Gal moves to Texas, you still long for the crispness of the season. I know the colors don't change like the Midwest, but just knowing that it's the quiet, reflective season of the year, makes me want to curl up with a book, put on a big pot of homemade soup and chill.

Happy Autumn!

Discovery

The first time I remember that I could do something well, was when I learned how to make a Granny Square Afghan.

My memory of this event came after seeing an afghan my maternal grandmother made. 

Her pattern was created with monochromatic colors in the center of each square. 

Each center was designed with assorted shades of blue, red, orange, green or yellow. 

Every block was then outlined in black and the entire blanket edged in a simple black scallop. I thought it was beautiful! I wanted to learn how to make this blanket.

One day while I was at her home, I asked her to teach me to make an afghan just like hers. This day began with a trip to the basement of her farmhouse. In the dark basement—which I always found a little scary—was the cabinet that had the many remnants of her previous projects. There were little bits of wool yarn, metal crochet hooks and an assortment of other colorful threads. We searched through the cabinet until we found just the right supplies. 

This began my learning experience and what later would become a favorite pastime. 

My grandmother was going to teach me how to crochet.

Now, looking back, I don’t remember the process of learning to crochet, but I do remember turning out neat little squares. As I completed each one, I took pride in stacking them into neat little towers. With each small square, each accomplishment, I just knew that someday it would be an amazing blanket. It never was. I never completed the project. 

What I do remember about that day, was the musty smell of basement, the subdued lighting, the adventure of sharing this time with her and the fun I had.

I did learn how to crochet. I learned how to do it well. I was proud of what I could do. 

I knew I could create many more beautiful items. 

I had accomplished more than crocheting. 

I found that I had an intimate bond with my grandmother.

Years later, I crocheted. I crocheted often. My prolific creations included scarves and hats, countless afghans and delicate edges on linen handkerchiefs. Eventually, I did make an afghan just like grandmothers. This was my own personal success! 

And…my passion for crocheting continued for many years.

Throughout the years, I’ve enjoyed the adventure of finding these handmade ‘treasures’ that were created by others. Often people discard their beginning creations, but I continue to collect them, finding these small treasures at craft bazaars, flea markets or yard sales. These tiny bits and pieces can still inspire me to create, and they always remind me of my grandmother.

I know I have encouraged others to be creative, to learn a new craft and my continued thought is to do this for many more years. Being an inspiration to others may not necessarily come through teaching someone to crochet, but my wish is to inspire others to have a memory moment, try something new and share your gifts.

My grandmother did. I hope you’ll do the same.

This would be doing something well.

TRAUMA & PRAYER

This verse was emailed to me on May 7, 2007 as a chain letter from a co-worker. Usually, I do not participate in chain letters, but I had been compelled that evening to follow the instructions.The direction was to send it on to twelve friends and pray.
I did.


Here is the prayer that was included with the email letter:

May today be all that you need it to be today. May the peace of God and the freshness of the Holy Spirit rest in your thoughts, rule in your dreams tonight and conquer all your fears. May God manifest himself today in ways that you have never experienced. May your joys be fulfilled, your dreams be closer and your prayers be answered. I pray that faith enters a new height for you; I pray that your territory is enlarged and I pray that you step into your destiny within the ministry. I pray for peace, health, happiness and true undying love for God. I didn’t give any further thought to the letter until the next day after I was involved in a car accident.

On the morning of May 8 I left home headed toward Dallas for a 3 day training class. I had a new job as bookkeeper for The Salvation Army assigned to the Temple Corps. The morning was clear, the roads dry, my cup of coffee nestled in its holder, 91.3 FM playing softly on the radio and my cruise control set to 65 mph. It was to be a good morning and the start of a good day of training.

My day was about to change!

I was just about to Exit 303 on the north side of Temple on Interstate 35 when suddenly I was traveling backward--with my passenger doors scraping along the inside median! As I was traveling backward, I was praying out loud and asking for my guardian angels to come to help me. I held on to the steering wheel as hard as I could and managed to keep the car on the inside median. When my car came to a standstill, all I could see was the oncoming traffic and again prayed that no one would hit my car. I began flashing my car lights on and off so that they could see that I was there in the small middle area next to the barricades.

Fortunately, no one hit my car while I was parked there. By this time my car would not start again, so I climbed out, grabbed my cell phone and purse and walked south away from my car, climbed over the center median barrier and sat down on the median wall to steady myself and my wobbly legs.

Within a few minutes I was dialing 911 for assistance, and when there was a break in the traffic, I crossed over to the east side of the expressway and sat in the tall grass.

It took a few moments for me to realize what had happened. At first I thought I must have blown a tire. That wasn’t the case. The driver of a truck parked a little further north had walked back, asked if I was okay, sat next to me and held my hand. He said he hit me and that he forgot I was there when he moved back into the far right lane. It wasn’t until I was sitting there talking to him that I really knew what happened. I had been sideswiped by a semi truck.

Fire trucks and paramedics arrived within minutes. Amazingly, no one else was involved in this incident. Later, I imagined there must have been dozens of guardian angels flying around protecting everyone driving that morning.

As I was transported to the hospital I wondered how I escaped with what seemed to be little injury. Within a few hours they released me to my home to sleep and recover. This accident could have been much worse. All I knew was that I was alive—bumped and bruised and a terrible headache—but I was alive!

Is there power in prayer? Yes! There is power in prayer even through the simple act of sending, receiving and praying for friends when they send a chain letter and ask you to share it with someone else. This was one email and one prayer that I believe changed my life and kept me safe.

THE SUN WILL SHINE AGAIN

My life began anew about five years ago. 

It seemed that after years of managing to muddle through a complicated existence as a lonely wife and working mother, I was ready for a new start. Busy days and sleepless nights had taken its toll on me, but now I was ready to begin again. It has been four years of being single following my divorce--it was time to move forward.

There were new adventures ahead.

The forecast for my life began with venturing into the unknown territory of online dating. This came upon the urging of a younger friend who had already acquired the skills for navigating this dating experience. Within a few weeks I had signed on with the two leading companies in this industry. One company claimed life-long relationships (built on several key components), but this left me without anything or anyone of value! The second service seemed like the smorgasbord of the dating world. Eventually, and with several difficult starts, I found friendship with a couple of seemingly nice men. We conversed through instant messenger, emails and the eventual real time phone conversations and dates. There were coffee dates, dinner dates, movie dates, flowers, wine and long walks.

Finally, for me, I felt the sun appeared from behind the clouds. 

Here was the special someone. 

Here was the person that I had been looking for. 

Here was the man who understood how to treat a lady. 

ME—I was that lady! 

There was regular phone calls filled with bright and lively conversations, red roses and sweet Merlot wine, doors being opened and chairs being pulled out for me at dinners. 

This gentleman was the complete package deal—well-groomed and mannered. 

He was a man with finesse.

It was then that the sun came out from behind the clouds of my former life, and I began to feel complete once again.

During the past few years, I have experienced the radiance of sunlight in my life. 

The days were filled with blue skies and warmth. 

How is it then that behind each sunlit day, cloudy days seem to follow? 

I thought I was exempt from these overcast days. 

I knew my life was different from everyone else. 

It was the best life I ever experienced, but I had been blinded by the sunshine. 

What followed were grey skies and what seemed to be minor problems. 

Then the storm clouds appeared. 

It must be that thunderstorms are like the worst of our days--complete with the sky raining giant tears. Now, I have experienced all the weather conditions–sunshine, clouds and storms.

There is a sign on a business a few blocks away from my home. 

It reads: “Every path has a few puddles.” 

I’ve been contemplating that saying. 

I’ve decided that when the storms of life come; you will find yourself walking in the puddles. Are the puddles created from the tears that are shed?

If it is true that joy follows pain, that we learn our life lessons by the mistakes we’ve made, then I believe it is time for the sun to shine on my face once more. I am confident that I will find the rainbows again. I do believe something wonderful is going to happen in my life.

I believe in miracles.

I wish you sunshine and blue skies and love!

Dedicated to Diane

Today is the 29th birthday of a beautiful young woman.  This is not any young woman. She was to become my daughter in law.  My son, Thomas loved her from the time they were young adults.  When she was unexpectedly taken from our lives in 2004, it left a hole in our hearts.

She and I shared a love of lilacs.  It is our favorite flower.

The poem I've selected today is dedicated to Diane and my son.

Life continues, even after those we love pass away...but there are constant reminders of how they have touched our lives.  I found a poem that touched my heart and (again) reminds me of this special, talented, intelligent, caring and beautiful young woman who was included in our family.   Happy Birthday, Diane.  Here's your poem:

 ESSENCE OF A LILAC

Every lovely lilac has a pleasant scent,
it reminisce me full of lovely events,
but you are someone I can never neglect,
because that scent is you who it reflect.

I brought you a lilac that is white,
as you simper in an immeasurable delight,
it is amazing to witness an angel sniff in purity,
only to grin along because of your sincerity.

But whenever I am alone without you,
I lie on the grass with nothing to do,
only to dream of your sensitive touch,
for I can never love you too much.

Tonight I lie out in the wild plains,
with a mystifying essence I cannot explain,
then as I look at the plain of lovely lilacs,
I saw you and I did not know how to react.

You run towards me with all your might,
in tears you hug me excessively tight,
we kiss joyfully by the lustrous pond.
with the lilac a proof of our bond.

by Brian Wang

BROKEN HEARTS

"Our real blessings often appear to us in the shapes of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience, and we soon shall see them in their proper figures."~~Joseph Addison

His love motivates her respect...Her respect motivates his love...

...is this the TRUE answer to prevention of broken hearts??

"Poetry spills from the cracks of a broken heart, but flows from one which is loved." ~Christopher Paul Rubero

WORKING ON HAPPINESS

"Since you will need fresh energy and new insight to handle what tomorrow throws at you, wait until it dawns before taking it on. Some of the things you do today may seem totally insignificant so far as tomorrow is concerned but stay at it."

~~Charles R. Swindoll

Rocky Paths, Sturdy Shoes and Weary Days

The final lines in my daily devotional:

"Each of us may be sure that if God sends us over rocky paths, He will provide us with sturdy shoes. He will never send us on any journey without equipping us well." ...Alexander McLaren 

I have been thinking about this verse all morning. 

Recently is seems that my life path is cluttered by emotional debris, and I cannot seem to find the smooth or clear path. 

Daily I feel distressed and filled with grief by the life I chose to share with someone that I thought was as committed to me as I was to him. 

It feels like so much hurt and betrayal that I often don't know what to do next.

Each day I begin with my devotions, my coffee, the little bits of news that I care to watch--but even though I have a daily routine, the load I'm carrying is so very heavy.

My daily question continues to be "WHY?" and daily there are no answers.

All I hear inside my head and heart is Life just is!

Friends have been caring with giving their advice on how to change a daily routine, don't do things you used to do, get out and do things for yourself and on and on. It's been said, "just give those sorrowful feelings over to God".

This is work for me and as much as I love the advice from my family and friends, I believe it is always easier for them to find the 'simple answers' when they are not the person whose heart has been broken.

I often wonder if God is really there and listening to me?

Corrie ten Boom said, "never be afraid to trust an unknown future to an all-knowing God." I guess she would know.

I just wish I had sturdier boots because my feet are getting tired of the hike.